At the time I write this blog post, Jeff Pearlman’s new youtube channel “Press Box Chronicles with Jeff Pearlman” has 1.2k subscribers and his 2nd video about his John Rocker story only has 708 views. But that’s simply because his channel is a week old, has 2 videos, and the Rocker video is 16 hours old. Pearlman rapidly grew his tiktok channel to 200k+ subscribers and I expect his Youtube channel to be a huge hit. I’m just a big fan of his so I’m onto this early.
Definitely check out his channel and his video: “The Interview That Changed My Life Forever: The John Rocker story.”
Did It Really Change My Life?
Yes, but in a much different way than how it changed Mr. Pearlman’s.
I’m going to spoil the ending so you can decide if you want to read on or watch my video:
- My Rocker-supportive stance at the time made my wife seriously question whether I was the right man for her and if we should actually get married (we were engaged).
- Watching me keep an open mind, listen to her differing opinion, and slowly evolve my own opinion was the reassurance she needed. It also added to what she always considered one of my most important asssets: no intelligence and reason.
- On a larger scale, it was a huge moment in my overall transformation from a southern, conservative Republican who was simply raised that way, to the very far left, highly progressive liberal that I am today.
I’m not giving Mr. Pearlman ALL the credit for my marriage or my own philosophical evolution, but I definitely give him some. And his article was a significant catalyst for both.
The Atlanta Braves Dynasty of the 1990s
Yeah, that’s where this starts.
In 1999 I was dating the wonderful woman who is now my wife (and has been since 2001!). A few months before the story broke, my family had taken us to a Braves game and we’d seen John Rocker pitch. I was a huge fan of his dominating presence on the mound – especially since historically the biggest weakness of my beloved Atlanta Braves was the lack of a true dominant closer. My Braves won 14 consecutive division titles and 5 NL pennants, but only one World Series title. The lack of a dominant closer was the biggest reason for that.
Along comes this absolute beast of a pitcher with 3 dominant pitches (there’s an inside story there all of its own…) and a swagger that just added to the fun of it. Even better, he was from MACON (a Georgia native!) – the city where my parents lived at the time and I had briefly lived between Georgetown University and The University of Georgia School of Law.
When Pearlman’s article broke, my family and I believed it was an unfair hit piece. Pearlman “took advantage of confidence”, “pretended to be a friend”, and tricked the unsavvy, young pitcher. Perhaps Pearlman even goaded him into getting on a roll and egged him into saying things worse than he actually thought!
My argument had been:
“He thought he was saying those things privately to a buddy, not publicly and on the record.”
“Guys talk shit around their friends. That doesn’t mean they really mean it.”
Secretly, unspoken: “FUCK! WE NEED THIS GUY! I’M SICK OF MADDUX, GLAVINE, AND SMOLTZ HANDING OVER THE BALL TO SOME SCRUB WHO BLOWS IT FOR US!”
But my wife wasn’t having it. She disagreed with us immediately and openly:
“Publicly or privately, if you say those things you are a bad person. The moment you speak them out loud you can and should be judged for them.”
“Your friends should call you out for your shitty opinions to your face and help you be a better person.”
And if she’d heard my secret argument, “You care about sports way too much, honey.”
My Wife Was Right. 100% Right.
She was right and in my heart and soul I knew it immediately. We would discuss it many times over the next few weeks and months, and each time she’d whittle me down a little more. I never defended the content of what he said (tons of racist, sexist, anti-lgbt hate and bigotry among other things), but the context in which he said it. But the truth is, she was 100% right.
There is NO place for that kind of hateful thinking. The moment you speak it out loud, you are subject to being judged by anyone who hears. If you speak it in front of a journalist, you’re telling the world. And if you speak it in front of friends or family, they need to call you out for it or they are just as bad. (Also: If you know that journalist is tape recording and taking notes, you’re an idiot.)
Thank You, Jeff Pearlman. But More Importantly, Thank You to my Wife.
I have always been grateful to Mr. Pearlman for taking that flight down to Georgia, getting to know the real John Rocker, and exposing him. Furthermore, I am grateful that he always stood strong and never walked it back because he knew it was all the truth and it needed to be out there in all its ugly glory.
In the grand scheme of things, the John Rocker story is not terribly significant. Rocker is just one of countless hateful, grotesque, spoiled, bigoted, extremely privileged white men who has been allowed to get away with all sorts of horrible things and play the victim whenever he faced even the slightest consequences for his actions. But in my life, his story was a significant marker in my evolution and growth that will always stand out and be VERY significant.
The fact it was an event and story my wife and I shared makes it even more memorable and impactful. It is a story that allowed us to grow together and in this case, for her to help me improve. In our 23 years (and counting!) of marriage I hope I’ve inspired her to grow positively as well.
This is why journalism is so important – even sports journalism.
This is why free speech, freedom of the press, and the 1st Ammendment are so important.
Telling and sharing the truth affects people. It changes people. And by changing people, you change the world.
I am a dramatically better person because of Mr. Pearlman’s article and because my wife challenged my backward thinking. They gave me the opportunity to learn and grow as a person. Since that time I’ve learned countless lessons that helped me grow and evolve into a much better version of myself. That’s a process that never ends and I hope I’ll be better tomorrow than I was today.
Perhaps by making these posts and videos, I’ll help someone else with their journey. I can only hope.
